Later that same day...
16 years ago
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Two relatively cool things
The first is super cool, no questions asked. I have long believed that solar energy is the best answer for many of out planet's problems (with geo-thermal helping out here and there). The cheaper and more efficient solar energy becomes the simpler it will be for everyone to use. Developments like this, and the solar window panes that were in the news last month, will one day lead to a free-er economy that is no longer based around energy.
Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness
This little piano piece always seemed to help me going through high school, and probably parts of college too. Whether I was playing it to fall asleep to, wake up to, or cry to, it always fit the circumstances. Maybe it's because of all that high school drama, but this song can still make me emote... well not this song. I always listened to the first track on disc one of the album with the same name. This is Billy playing what must be the full version of that song. The CD version starts in the middle of this, and I can understand why it was cut down for the record... they start it at the catchy part; that's what record producers do.
This is fun because you can tell it's really early in the song's life. Billy messes it up a few times here and there (nice to know that everyone can mess up now and then, although I'll say that Billy also messed up when he shut down Zwan... that pissed me off). Plus, you know it's old because Billy's still got his hair!!
This is fun because you can tell it's really early in the song's life. Billy messes it up a few times here and there (nice to know that everyone can mess up now and then, although I'll say that Billy also messed up when he shut down Zwan... that pissed me off). Plus, you know it's old because Billy's still got his hair!!
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
I got hungry
**Update - For the most part, it's been cleaned out now**I got hungry and thought I'd make some lunch. So, I opened up my fridge to see what may be available to me... and here is another thing, that maybe, is a bad habit I might want to work on. I can't tell you how old some of that stuff is...
But it might be fun trying ;) Let's go from top to bottom.
So, those are green grapes, I think I bought them about 3 and a half weeks ago when I decided I was gonna go on a health kick and eat more fruits... actually that was the last time I went to the grocery store for any serious shopping, so alot of this stuff probably came from then too I bet.
Next there's some lemon juice, that stuff never goes bad right? There's half a cup of some Strawberry soda... the last of a 2-liter I got with the grapes. I can't believe it's not butter spray (which is quite awesome if you've never tried it) and in the back there is a bottle of White wine... now, I don't even drink. I have no memory of where that came from, and I guess I've keeping it back there in case some possible future guest wants some? (come to think of it I have a whole liquor cabinet full of stuff, but since I never drink I guess my guests and ex's always felt like they shouldn't drink around me??) It might be time for everything except the lemon juice and butter spray to get tossed on that shelf.
Shelf 2 begins with a sonic cup that I swear has diet coke in it (I never drink diet, but they gave it to me in the drive through so I dealt with it), I think its a little over a week old. The date on the jug of milk says 7-09-08... it hasn't curdled yet, but I don't think I'd try drinking it. I don't know if you can see but there's some eggs back there, probably used in some sort of brownie adventure... I don't know how old they are. As long as nothing's growing in them, they're good right? Let's see... my ex girlfriend left some sugar free yogurt in there, it's bound to be three months old... and there's some humus from Neomonde (I love that place) and I think it's about two weeks old.
Shelf 3 holds a three week old brat (I guess I'm keeping it for a rainy day?) and a tupperware that once held some brisket and egg noodles my brother cooked; I ate the brisket and left the noodles... now I think it holds some form of penicillin.
Finally, the bottom shelf holds the freshest of all my grocery's... a case of mountain dew.
I didn't even look in the door or in the freezer. In the end I used the last two slices of some stale bread to make a PB sandwich...
It's a good thing trash day is tomorrow I guess.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Bo Bo's is BACK!
It's like a good friend has been out of town for a couple months... Bo Jangles on Western is open again and they have free iced tea (unlike the crappy bo jangles in Charlotte...)
Cuban Break-through!
Well I just had a group class with Inga... (damn, I forgot how hot she can be). So, I've been going a little too crazy with this lifting of the heel thing. The heel will still lift to allow rotation of the foot, but it's not so much lifted on its own as it's drawn up by... wait for it... the hip settle of the same leg. Now wait, you say, how can you lift a heel if you're settling on that foot? Because the action is fluid and it only begins to ever so slightly rise up as the hip pulls the free leg over. Then, when you pop the free foot in front and transfer partial weight to it, the now back heal is off the floor fully with tons of toe pressure (rather than the ball of the foot on the floor, this might be wrong but I'll wait to be corrected).
She pointed out that I am collapsing my top when I compress. In my desire to get a full compression I've been pulling my shoulder down with it, and it's breaking my side and creating a bad line. It seems like there's almost two separate points of compression, the hip and the lat. Before I've been thinking of it as a point between those two that crunches, but I think its two 'crunches' at once. I don't mean crunch, but flexing of muscles. However I think about it, the important part is keeping my top very up and tall, giving me a bigger look, and then achieving the 'champ' look by rotating that top over my compressed lower half. I'm still a little fuzzy on how to describe it. I'm at the 1st level of understanding right now with this. So, I may not be describing it quite right yet.
Good lesson. I learned a lot and got really sweaty. Def worth the $10.
She pointed out that I am collapsing my top when I compress. In my desire to get a full compression I've been pulling my shoulder down with it, and it's breaking my side and creating a bad line. It seems like there's almost two separate points of compression, the hip and the lat. Before I've been thinking of it as a point between those two that crunches, but I think its two 'crunches' at once. I don't mean crunch, but flexing of muscles. However I think about it, the important part is keeping my top very up and tall, giving me a bigger look, and then achieving the 'champ' look by rotating that top over my compressed lower half. I'm still a little fuzzy on how to describe it. I'm at the 1st level of understanding right now with this. So, I may not be describing it quite right yet.
Good lesson. I learned a lot and got really sweaty. Def worth the $10.
It's about time.
Ted Stevens indicted, longest-serving GOP senator
Isn't this the same guy who built a multi-million dollar bridge to nowhere? I mean, literally, it went to a small island with something like 5 residents (I'm exaggerating, but he's known for throwing a huge amount of all our money into really silly pork-barrel spending projects).And it really doesn't help the Republican party. Here's another senior senator with a criminal investigation surrounding him (Larry Craig...). Maybe the Dem's are paying off the cops and the reporters or maybe they're trying really hard not to get caught right now, but it's working. It's a little hypacritical for the stand up, moral, conservatives to be the ones getting arrested. It sure as hell doesn't help McCain any.
New Gimme Gimmes!
So I sent this from my phone in the store. Then I had a small debacle getting to play in my car. I just didn't work. I took it back in the store and it worked on CD players inside. Then, I put it back in the car and it worked... concerns me that perhaps my cd player is trying to quit on me.
It's not so much NEW Gimme Gimme's as much as its 12 year old b-sides that they've put together and just newly released on one disc (... I just thought about the difference between floppy disk and compact disc).
So far I like it.
another bad habit...
I leave my clothes in the dryer... now I'm wearing a wrinkled t-shirt. poop on it.
Monday, July 28, 2008
a true American
So I thought I'd demonstrate American-ness in the truest way possible... by being a capitalist! I added the little google adsense button over there. I might play with the size and shape of it some, and I doubt that I'll ever have enough people read my blog AND click on the ad to generate any income from it. It is, however, a fun little experiment for me. They claim that the ads are generated based on what I write about in my blog. Right now I'm sure it will start selling you all types of emo equipment as I've been in a very black fingernail polish mood of writing lately, but it will be interesting to see what Google's bot thinks my blog is about. I'm interested to see what it boils my writings down to. The essence of what it thinks I am is what it's going to try and sell to you.
dead pigeons only take you so far
How do you talk to a recent EX? Things aren't that much different in the world but they sure do feel that way. So, even though the only thing on your mind is to talk about the relationship in some sense, that's the last thing that should be talked about (in public at least). You can talk about some youtube video of a pelican eating a pigeon, and laugh and discuss the morbidity of that for a little while, but then you're left looking at each other with the imagery of dead fowl in your mind. Then you just feel foul.
How do you deal with pain?
There are a lot of ways to try to manage pain. I'm not in an physical pain right now, but it might be interesting to see how those methods might relate to hurt in an emotional sense. Let's start with some of the most common.
- Ignore it. We all do it. You get a small headache or a weird muscle pain in your back and you just try to ignore it. Sometimes it works and the the pain subsides on its own. Other times it just gets worse, and the more you try to push it out of your mind the more you feel it. Sometimes there are little things that irritate or hurt you that may not bother after a day or so. Then there are other hurts that the more you try to avoid them the deeper they bury themselves in your core, and the more difficult it becomes to ignore them. I read a study that talked about the importance of dealing with physical pain as soon as possible. Apparently the longer you let pain persist the more likely you are to experience chronic pain for the rest of your life. You can't just push things away. The more you do that the more likely you will hurt all the time; chronic hurt will overshadow happiness.
- Take something for it. You get a headache and you take an aspirin or something for it. Most of the time this works. The medicine temporarily alleviates the pain while your body works to correct the source of it. The problem here comes into to play when we get addicted to the medicine or your body can't correct itself. You feel hurt and alone, so you spend time with someone else or others (or some might go to the strip club) and while you're with them the hurt is gone and you feel pretty darn good. But eventually the aspirin wears off and you're by yourself again. Now the hurt comes back and it might be throbbing more than ever (and you might have the added bonus of smelling like cheap perfume and cigarettes). So unless you work to fix the pain or the hurt all you're doing is managing it, which is close to ignoring it.
- Stub your toe. Almost humorously someone might tell you that if you've got a headache just bite your tongue or stub your toe and you won't feel your headache anymore. If one aspect of your life hurts just shift focus to other parts that suck worse. Well, this is just self-destructive, and its does is ignore the issue. We already know how that turns out.
- Go the the Doctor. The pain just won't go away, so you go to your doctor and he or she helps to figure out why your headache won't go away. Then they give you some ways to help with that headache and avoid headaches in the future (for me it was quitting my job at the insurance company). Your doctor helps you find the root of the pain, talk to someone who'll help you find the root of your hurt. Once you know what hurts you can talk to someone who'll help you reduce your current hurt and prevent a similar hurt in the future.
- Don't be a glutton for punishment. My mother always said this, and my very often homeopathic doctor often echoed it. I'd say, "Mom, it hurts when I do this" and her response was "Then don't do that." I know this sounds a little like ignoring pain, but its not. In this sense the pain only comes when you make it. You've got a bruise or a sore spot and when you push it, it's painful. So don't push it. You've got a sore spot, so don't expose yourself to the hurt that made you sore. Your bruise will heal over time, but not if you keep pushing at it. Once you identify the source, your hurt will begin to heal over time, but not if you keep picking at it; not if you don't let the wound close.
So, what have we learned? Don't ignore things, seek help to find the root, and let yourself heal.
[Plus strip clubs just leave you broke and smelly ;)]
- Ignore it. We all do it. You get a small headache or a weird muscle pain in your back and you just try to ignore it. Sometimes it works and the the pain subsides on its own. Other times it just gets worse, and the more you try to push it out of your mind the more you feel it. Sometimes there are little things that irritate or hurt you that may not bother after a day or so. Then there are other hurts that the more you try to avoid them the deeper they bury themselves in your core, and the more difficult it becomes to ignore them. I read a study that talked about the importance of dealing with physical pain as soon as possible. Apparently the longer you let pain persist the more likely you are to experience chronic pain for the rest of your life. You can't just push things away. The more you do that the more likely you will hurt all the time; chronic hurt will overshadow happiness.
- Take something for it. You get a headache and you take an aspirin or something for it. Most of the time this works. The medicine temporarily alleviates the pain while your body works to correct the source of it. The problem here comes into to play when we get addicted to the medicine or your body can't correct itself. You feel hurt and alone, so you spend time with someone else or others (or some might go to the strip club) and while you're with them the hurt is gone and you feel pretty darn good. But eventually the aspirin wears off and you're by yourself again. Now the hurt comes back and it might be throbbing more than ever (and you might have the added bonus of smelling like cheap perfume and cigarettes). So unless you work to fix the pain or the hurt all you're doing is managing it, which is close to ignoring it.
- Stub your toe. Almost humorously someone might tell you that if you've got a headache just bite your tongue or stub your toe and you won't feel your headache anymore. If one aspect of your life hurts just shift focus to other parts that suck worse. Well, this is just self-destructive, and its does is ignore the issue. We already know how that turns out.
- Go the the Doctor. The pain just won't go away, so you go to your doctor and he or she helps to figure out why your headache won't go away. Then they give you some ways to help with that headache and avoid headaches in the future (for me it was quitting my job at the insurance company). Your doctor helps you find the root of the pain, talk to someone who'll help you find the root of your hurt. Once you know what hurts you can talk to someone who'll help you reduce your current hurt and prevent a similar hurt in the future.
- Don't be a glutton for punishment. My mother always said this, and my very often homeopathic doctor often echoed it. I'd say, "Mom, it hurts when I do this" and her response was "Then don't do that." I know this sounds a little like ignoring pain, but its not. In this sense the pain only comes when you make it. You've got a bruise or a sore spot and when you push it, it's painful. So don't push it. You've got a sore spot, so don't expose yourself to the hurt that made you sore. Your bruise will heal over time, but not if you keep pushing at it. Once you identify the source, your hurt will begin to heal over time, but not if you keep picking at it; not if you don't let the wound close.
So, what have we learned? Don't ignore things, seek help to find the root, and let yourself heal.
[Plus strip clubs just leave you broke and smelly ;)]
Sunday, July 27, 2008
Hooray!!!!! for left over Chinese food
That is all. Just wanted to express my happiness with the left over chinese food I have... err had. It was tasty.
Don't let the things you want make you unhappy.
That phrase never made much sense to me. It just plain confused me. On its own I don't get it, but I think it's the unknown second half to another phrase, "Be happy with what you have... don't let the things you want make you unhappy." Once I put that together in my brain it made perfect sense. I just wished I could have put it together sooner.
I've always known this about myself. I've never happy with what I've got, and I'm always looking for the next upgrade or cool new thing. I tend to focus on what's missing in my life rather than what I have. It came to a head this weekend at the Chris Cornell concert. After his set, instead of thinking, "Wow, what a kick ass set. I'm so stoked I got to see Chris Cornell," my first thoughts were, "Damn. He didn't play song x and song y."
I have got to try and change this about myself. So I thought I'd start by making a list of some of the good things I do have going for me. Here it is (in no particular order):
- A lot of potential close friends. I know a lot of people and I get along with a lot of people. I just need to cultivate those relationships and help them grow.
- Time to spend with those friends. The free time I have isn't spoken for, and I can put it towards building those friendships.
- My job. I love my job. I get paid to be the center of attention. I know it won't last forever, and in a year or so I'll be forced to find something else, but until then I'm gaining experience and building my little vita. So, it'll be easier to find a new position when I do have to leave.
- My other job. I get paid to teach people how to dance! Dr. Huggard would be proud. I took my money pit addiction and turned into an income device that will at least pay for my habit, if not turn a profit.
- Fri. I love that little guy (even though I shut him out of the room so I can type this up without him sitting in front of the screen). He continues to love me no matter what. The best cat I could ever ask for.
- My car. Its NC State Red, gets great mileage, and its even a little sporty. Soooo much better than the truck.
- Gas prices are going down! On the way back from Charlotte I saw gas for $3.67!
Now let me take this opportunity to say that YES, THIS IS A GOOD THING. Recently some facebook friends of mine (and don't get me started on how Facebook has bastardized the definition of friend) have joined a group supporting high gas prices. While I understand the primary argument, that industry needs an impetus to force changes that will reduce our dependence on foreign fossil fuels that destroy our environment, I think it's a short sighted perspective. At the risk of sounding cliche... Think of the children. The people who are being hurt the worst by high fuel prices don't necessarily even drive cars to be fueled. Soaring fuel prices increase the cost of everything else. Diesel cost more and so it costs more to transport food to the grocery store, the alternative ethanol pulls corn away from animal feed and so the staples meat, bread, and milk cost more. Now the poor family, who rides the bus because they can't afford a car, has to choose between bread on the table or new clothing or medicine or quality shelter. All because gas prices are high. High fuel costs increase the divide between the haves and the have nots. I agree that something needs to change and the industry needs to break free of damaging fossil fuels, but I don't think we should be passive and let high gas prices force a change, ignoring the marginalized. The change needs to be in ourselves. We need to actively make choices that will force the industry. Buy an efficient car not because of fuel prices, but because its the right thing to do.
Now that I've completed my ranting and raving...
- Dance. I feel like I'm hitting a new golden era of development. It's still a slow process, but I'm making new connections and developing a deeper understanding of concepts... and I might get to do a stag leap in my paso :)
- My house. While it may not look that great, I've put a lot of work into this place, and its a hell of a lot nicer than it was. And despite what it looks like, the neighborhood is pretty quite. Plus, its close enough to ride the bus to campus.
- My body is changing... and I don't mean like it did in middle school. I'm exercising more now, and in conjunction with dance, its creating muscle definition and flexibility that I've never had before. I am going to look good in my Latin shirts. Period.
So when I stop and think about it, I really do have a lot of good things going for me. These are just a few. And I actually feel a little better about things now that I've reminded myself what I do have. I'm not 100%. I've still lost something very important, and there is a huge empty void there now, but that just means I have more room for new friendships and deeper relationships.
Always look on the bright side of life. Da-doot, da-doot, da-doo-da-doot.
I've always known this about myself. I've never happy with what I've got, and I'm always looking for the next upgrade or cool new thing. I tend to focus on what's missing in my life rather than what I have. It came to a head this weekend at the Chris Cornell concert. After his set, instead of thinking, "Wow, what a kick ass set. I'm so stoked I got to see Chris Cornell," my first thoughts were, "Damn. He didn't play song x and song y."
I have got to try and change this about myself. So I thought I'd start by making a list of some of the good things I do have going for me. Here it is (in no particular order):
- A lot of potential close friends. I know a lot of people and I get along with a lot of people. I just need to cultivate those relationships and help them grow.
- Time to spend with those friends. The free time I have isn't spoken for, and I can put it towards building those friendships.
- My job. I love my job. I get paid to be the center of attention. I know it won't last forever, and in a year or so I'll be forced to find something else, but until then I'm gaining experience and building my little vita. So, it'll be easier to find a new position when I do have to leave.
- My other job. I get paid to teach people how to dance! Dr. Huggard would be proud. I took my money pit addiction and turned into an income device that will at least pay for my habit, if not turn a profit.
- Fri. I love that little guy (even though I shut him out of the room so I can type this up without him sitting in front of the screen). He continues to love me no matter what. The best cat I could ever ask for.
- My car. Its NC State Red, gets great mileage, and its even a little sporty. Soooo much better than the truck.
- Gas prices are going down! On the way back from Charlotte I saw gas for $3.67!
Now let me take this opportunity to say that YES, THIS IS A GOOD THING. Recently some facebook friends of mine (and don't get me started on how Facebook has bastardized the definition of friend) have joined a group supporting high gas prices. While I understand the primary argument, that industry needs an impetus to force changes that will reduce our dependence on foreign fossil fuels that destroy our environment, I think it's a short sighted perspective. At the risk of sounding cliche... Think of the children. The people who are being hurt the worst by high fuel prices don't necessarily even drive cars to be fueled. Soaring fuel prices increase the cost of everything else. Diesel cost more and so it costs more to transport food to the grocery store, the alternative ethanol pulls corn away from animal feed and so the staples meat, bread, and milk cost more. Now the poor family, who rides the bus because they can't afford a car, has to choose between bread on the table or new clothing or medicine or quality shelter. All because gas prices are high. High fuel costs increase the divide between the haves and the have nots. I agree that something needs to change and the industry needs to break free of damaging fossil fuels, but I don't think we should be passive and let high gas prices force a change, ignoring the marginalized. The change needs to be in ourselves. We need to actively make choices that will force the industry. Buy an efficient car not because of fuel prices, but because its the right thing to do.
Now that I've completed my ranting and raving...
- Dance. I feel like I'm hitting a new golden era of development. It's still a slow process, but I'm making new connections and developing a deeper understanding of concepts... and I might get to do a stag leap in my paso :)
- My house. While it may not look that great, I've put a lot of work into this place, and its a hell of a lot nicer than it was. And despite what it looks like, the neighborhood is pretty quite. Plus, its close enough to ride the bus to campus.
- My body is changing... and I don't mean like it did in middle school. I'm exercising more now, and in conjunction with dance, its creating muscle definition and flexibility that I've never had before. I am going to look good in my Latin shirts. Period.
So when I stop and think about it, I really do have a lot of good things going for me. These are just a few. And I actually feel a little better about things now that I've reminded myself what I do have. I'm not 100%. I've still lost something very important, and there is a huge empty void there now, but that just means I have more room for new friendships and deeper relationships.
Always look on the bright side of life. Da-doot, da-doot, da-doo-da-doot.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
