Later that same day...
16 years ago
Saturday, August 30, 2008
NSFW?
This one goes out to my friends who still have strong connections to their middle school sense of humor. You know who you are. Enjoy the shortest Me First song I know of. You have to click PLAY on the right side of the screen. (This might not be safe for work...)
Friday, August 29, 2008
OOH!
I got business cards today! I feel important now. They're just cards for the dance studio, but now I feel more official. Plus, whenever I do volunteer lessons and people ask me where I teach, now I can give them my card and I'll get a lesson out of it. More lessons mean more money, and that's helpful. Plus the more I keep myself busy the better.
don't cry for me
Although I've been having all sorts of sadgasms in my posts of late, don't feel too bad for me. This is just a phase of adjustment. I promise I will bounce back from this eventually. I'll keep my promise, don't keep your distance.
This is a pretty cool vid. I really like how the lips sync up. Awesome.
This is a pretty cool vid. I really like how the lips sync up. Awesome.
and another thing
It sucks to have my huge, kick ass bed all to myself. I'm so damn lonely in that bed. The worst part about it is that I know the person I want to share my bed with is in bed with another man.
The fact that I'm a little sad right now is compounded by the fact that my EX is so openly happy, and has never been so happy in her life, now that she's with her new man... ugh.
The fact that I'm a little sad right now is compounded by the fact that my EX is so openly happy, and has never been so happy in her life, now that she's with her new man... ugh.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
My mood is good.
Right now, at this very instant, my mood is good. For the first time since 1956 our football team has been shut out in back to back games (whoever taught Daniel Evans how to pass deserves a punch in the face), but I feel good. The game was less important than the ability to spend some time with friends who I have not seen in a while.
I've had a rough time of it the last couple of days. That new unavailable girl's boyfriend has moved down, and I have not seen her since. But, you know, I think that's ok. I told my brother about the whole situation, and his response was "Aren't there any single girls in Raleigh?" I'm sure there are bro, but I haven't met many of them yet, or at least I haven't met many that flirt back with me. As I think it about this whole thing I don't think much of it's my fault. I mean I'll take some of the blame. As soon as she told me she had a boyfriend I should have told myself 'Thanks for playing' and moved on to the next girl, but she didn't make it that easy. (Warning: I'm about to bitch for a minute) First, she waited until the end of what seemed to be a pretty fun first date to mention that there was 'some guy back home.' In an attempt to avoid this situation I asked her if she was seeing anyone. Refering to him as 'some guy back home' (home is 1,200 miles away) implied that he wasn't very important and that I had an 'in.' She calls me up a day or so later to see if I want to go out to dinner with her and another girl. I go, and she sits next to me... noticably closer than she needed to, does all the flirty things of bumping and nudging and smiling and everything else. At this point I'm thinking that this super cute girl has a thing for me. Then the next time we were supposed to hang out she blew me off, so I should known right there that this wouldn't work out, but when I see her the next day flirtations continue and tentative plans are made to hang out again. Again I get blown off (and I do something stupid that I'm not going to talk about here). Eventually though we do hang out again... at a pool... and she's in a hot little bikini. This is where I find out that 'some guy' is a boyfriend of three years who is about to move in with her. We've hung out and chatted and FLIRTED over a week and I'm just now learning that there's a live-in boyfriend on the way?! It's too late now, I'm hooked! Boyfriend's not here yet, he hasn't moved down yet, there's a chance he might not move down, I have a chance (the things we tell ourselves...). On the way back to her place we stop for pizza and we walk around campus some in the warm summer night. We both start to look at each other for a little too long, if you know what I mean... but we keep it a short walk. I take her home and help her set up some stuff in the apartment and play with her kittens... and we start to talk about the boyfriend and the conflicting thoughts and feelings that she's having (We agree that we just has what could have been called a great date had she been single and able to call it a date). I get a couple of really great hugs and go home, but we make plans to each other the next day. Of course I get blown off again, this time its for school work, so I'm okay with it, but we end up talking on the phone for an hour and a half. We talk about all sorts of things, and she tells me that she's never talked to guy like this without having dated him for a while first, which is odd to me. Educated conversation just seems like its one of those things you do to learn whether or not you want to date someone. We've gone and started to build a relationship, but we've built it on borrowed time. So we go out for breakfast the next morning. I pick her up and she's in a hot little skirt that she purposely wore to look hot for me. Whether she admits it or not, I know she wanted to look for me. We sit across from one another and often catch ourselves looking at each other. She tells me to quit it, but she's looking at me just as often. In another circumstance we would have torn into each other, but we didn't. We talked, we had fun.... she let me hold her hand for few seconds before she thought better of it. I dropped her off at home, and she was good. Nothing but a hug goodbye and as my hands slid down her arms to leave she caught my hands and gave a little squeeze. The kind of sqeeze that says I really like you. And that was it. The end. I haven't really seen her much since. Now, there were a few meetings here and there that I haven't mentioned, but these were the big ones. These were the ones that strung me along. Not only did she let me do it, but I think she even encouraged it. It's been almost a week since breakfast, and I think I've just about broken free from this spell.
She tells me she want to get together and have more 'deep' philisophical type discussions; she can't have intellegent conversations with 'some guy'. I want to, but I'm not sure I should. This goes back to my whole, if it hurts when you do that then stop doing that thing, maybe I should limit my exposure to her... or maybe I'm a big boy and can just suck it up and get over it. But I know what I don not want to happen. I do not want to become some kind of substitute boyfriend that she can have deep, meaningful converstations with while 'some guy' gets to share a bed with her. That's like dealing with some of the hard parts of having a girlfriend but not getting any of the rewards.
I'm not saying that I'm completely over all this yet, but talking about it here will certainly help me to get over things, or at least deal with things better. I feel like I haven't really had many people to listen to me lately... whether anyone actually reads all of this or not, at least I feel like someone has listened to me.
And yet my mood is still pretty good. The high of fellowship and football :)
It's funny. This is not at all what I thought this post would be about. I thought I'd talk about getting kicked out of the office, or if blissful ignorance is better than love lost, or mention an update on unavailable cute fiesty photographer and how I taught her boyfriend how to dance... I guess I need to post more often to get all this crap out there.
I've had a rough time of it the last couple of days. That new unavailable girl's boyfriend has moved down, and I have not seen her since. But, you know, I think that's ok. I told my brother about the whole situation, and his response was "Aren't there any single girls in Raleigh?" I'm sure there are bro, but I haven't met many of them yet, or at least I haven't met many that flirt back with me. As I think it about this whole thing I don't think much of it's my fault. I mean I'll take some of the blame. As soon as she told me she had a boyfriend I should have told myself 'Thanks for playing' and moved on to the next girl, but she didn't make it that easy. (Warning: I'm about to bitch for a minute) First, she waited until the end of what seemed to be a pretty fun first date to mention that there was 'some guy back home.' In an attempt to avoid this situation I asked her if she was seeing anyone. Refering to him as 'some guy back home' (home is 1,200 miles away) implied that he wasn't very important and that I had an 'in.' She calls me up a day or so later to see if I want to go out to dinner with her and another girl. I go, and she sits next to me... noticably closer than she needed to, does all the flirty things of bumping and nudging and smiling and everything else. At this point I'm thinking that this super cute girl has a thing for me. Then the next time we were supposed to hang out she blew me off, so I should known right there that this wouldn't work out, but when I see her the next day flirtations continue and tentative plans are made to hang out again. Again I get blown off (and I do something stupid that I'm not going to talk about here). Eventually though we do hang out again... at a pool... and she's in a hot little bikini. This is where I find out that 'some guy' is a boyfriend of three years who is about to move in with her. We've hung out and chatted and FLIRTED over a week and I'm just now learning that there's a live-in boyfriend on the way?! It's too late now, I'm hooked! Boyfriend's not here yet, he hasn't moved down yet, there's a chance he might not move down, I have a chance (the things we tell ourselves...). On the way back to her place we stop for pizza and we walk around campus some in the warm summer night. We both start to look at each other for a little too long, if you know what I mean... but we keep it a short walk. I take her home and help her set up some stuff in the apartment and play with her kittens... and we start to talk about the boyfriend and the conflicting thoughts and feelings that she's having (We agree that we just has what could have been called a great date had she been single and able to call it a date). I get a couple of really great hugs and go home, but we make plans to each other the next day. Of course I get blown off again, this time its for school work, so I'm okay with it, but we end up talking on the phone for an hour and a half. We talk about all sorts of things, and she tells me that she's never talked to guy like this without having dated him for a while first, which is odd to me. Educated conversation just seems like its one of those things you do to learn whether or not you want to date someone. We've gone and started to build a relationship, but we've built it on borrowed time. So we go out for breakfast the next morning. I pick her up and she's in a hot little skirt that she purposely wore to look hot for me. Whether she admits it or not, I know she wanted to look for me. We sit across from one another and often catch ourselves looking at each other. She tells me to quit it, but she's looking at me just as often. In another circumstance we would have torn into each other, but we didn't. We talked, we had fun.... she let me hold her hand for few seconds before she thought better of it. I dropped her off at home, and she was good. Nothing but a hug goodbye and as my hands slid down her arms to leave she caught my hands and gave a little squeeze. The kind of sqeeze that says I really like you. And that was it. The end. I haven't really seen her much since. Now, there were a few meetings here and there that I haven't mentioned, but these were the big ones. These were the ones that strung me along. Not only did she let me do it, but I think she even encouraged it. It's been almost a week since breakfast, and I think I've just about broken free from this spell.
She tells me she want to get together and have more 'deep' philisophical type discussions; she can't have intellegent conversations with 'some guy'. I want to, but I'm not sure I should. This goes back to my whole, if it hurts when you do that then stop doing that thing, maybe I should limit my exposure to her... or maybe I'm a big boy and can just suck it up and get over it. But I know what I don not want to happen. I do not want to become some kind of substitute boyfriend that she can have deep, meaningful converstations with while 'some guy' gets to share a bed with her. That's like dealing with some of the hard parts of having a girlfriend but not getting any of the rewards.
I'm not saying that I'm completely over all this yet, but talking about it here will certainly help me to get over things, or at least deal with things better. I feel like I haven't really had many people to listen to me lately... whether anyone actually reads all of this or not, at least I feel like someone has listened to me.
And yet my mood is still pretty good. The high of fellowship and football :)
It's funny. This is not at all what I thought this post would be about. I thought I'd talk about getting kicked out of the office, or if blissful ignorance is better than love lost, or mention an update on unavailable cute fiesty photographer and how I taught her boyfriend how to dance... I guess I need to post more often to get all this crap out there.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
I have one shiny nail...
I went to mall to get a new pair of slacks... and I returned with a new pair of jeans. Oh well. They were on sale, they're made from organic cotton (whoop de doo), and they're in my size (which is always a tough find). Honestly, the primary reason I didn't come back with a pair of slacks is that I couldn't find my size in any that I really wanted. I found one pair at the GAP that I liked and that fit me, but they're brown. I wasn't sure I had shoes that would go with them well enough, plus the last time I got pants that fit from GAP, they shrank in length and the break was too short after the first wash... so I'm a little nervous to get another pair. I really want some Producer pants from Express, but the nice ones are so freakin expensive!
While I was at the mall, an eastern european saleslady pounced on me. I understood very little of what she was saying; her accent was pretty thick. She asked me if I had heard of the dead sea and then scooped up my hand and started to buff my index finger nail. Now it's all shiny and smooth... I told her I don't need any. She tried to convince me my Mom and Grandmother would love me if I bought them some. I left. I hope my Mom and Grandma still love me.
While I was at the mall, an eastern european saleslady pounced on me. I understood very little of what she was saying; her accent was pretty thick. She asked me if I had heard of the dead sea and then scooped up my hand and started to buff my index finger nail. Now it's all shiny and smooth... I told her I don't need any. She tried to convince me my Mom and Grandmother would love me if I bought them some. I left. I hope my Mom and Grandma still love me.
Monday, August 25, 2008
Quote of the day...
"I don't know what they're called; I just pick 'em up and shoot things with 'em."
- A girl in one of my classes today talking about the different guns allowed during different parts of the hunting season.
Hilarious moment in class. She doesn't quite fit the stereotype of a hunter, at least in my mind. So the surprise of it made for enhanced hilarity.
- A girl in one of my classes today talking about the different guns allowed during different parts of the hunting season.
Hilarious moment in class. She doesn't quite fit the stereotype of a hunter, at least in my mind. So the surprise of it made for enhanced hilarity.
When life is hard you have to change
This was one of the first albums I ever bought with my own money, and this was one of my favorite songs from it. It made so much since in the depressed ages of middle and high school... although I'm not sure I really payed much attention to all of the lyrics then. The video is one big 90's cliche... but the song still has meaning.
Sometimes things are tough, and you look to sky and question if the big cheese has your interests in mind. And sometimes you wonder if life is really worth livin, but you got to keep on dreamin... when you stop you know you're gonna die, and right now I don't wanna die. Move right on to tomorrow. When life is hard you've got to change.
Sometimes things are tough, and you look to sky and question if the big cheese has your interests in mind. And sometimes you wonder if life is really worth livin, but you got to keep on dreamin... when you stop you know you're gonna die, and right now I don't wanna die. Move right on to tomorrow. When life is hard you've got to change.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
I've heard of four eyes, but four ears?
When we hear 'Mutant' we often think of X-Men and other heroes... but really mutants are just weird little offshoots of the norm that become a new norm. So, you think Yoda here will become a new breed? I wonder how many scientists are asking to clone him...
Saturday, August 23, 2008
I've done it again!
I have let something I can't have make me unhappy. The worst thing of this is that I walked right into it with my eyes wide open. I knew what I was getting myself into, but I did it anyway. It's like getting high... you know that you're eventually going to come down and crash hard, but you take the hit anyway. That's one of the reasons I've never done drugs. It's stupid to do something for temporary enjoyment when you know that in the end you'll be worse off than when you began.
I knew very early on that I wouldn't be able to get what I wanted, but I put my blinders on and reveled in the moment of something new. Now the moment has nearly passed, and I am beginning a fast and bumpy descent. A crash is eminent.
I knew very early on that I wouldn't be able to get what I wanted, but I put my blinders on and reveled in the moment of something new. Now the moment has nearly passed, and I am beginning a fast and bumpy descent. A crash is eminent.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Dance Your Cares Away!
Dance your cares away
worry's for another day
Let the music play
Down in Fraggle Rock!
So the Fraggles, who the kids are supposed to like and therefore emulate, are basically cracked out (just look at their eyes) hippies who live in a commune and steal from others for survival...
The other classes, the Doozers and the Gorgs, are the workers and farmers of this society and they're constantly belittled and made fun of. Fraggles don't just destroy the buildings that the Doozers erect, but they consume them. Literally consuming the resources of another culture and thinking little of it. The people that are working hard to build an infrastructure are trivialized and their work is consumed by hippies... there has to be some kind of rhetorical statement being made there. Then, we look at the Gorgs, the rich and agrarian group. They are portrayed as greedy and stupid; always being outsmarted by the agile hippie fraggles who steal their radishes.
No wonder my generation has little respect for the honorable professions of construction and agriculture... we were indoctrinated to believe that those workers are insignificant and ignorant!
PS - This is just based on my memory of the show and is a pretty shallow analysis. I was really just in a sort of bad mood when the theme song played on my Zune. It made me happy so I wanted to share the song... as I was watching the video is when I started thinking about all this other stuff...
worry's for another day
Let the music play
Down in Fraggle Rock!
So the Fraggles, who the kids are supposed to like and therefore emulate, are basically cracked out (just look at their eyes) hippies who live in a commune and steal from others for survival...
The other classes, the Doozers and the Gorgs, are the workers and farmers of this society and they're constantly belittled and made fun of. Fraggles don't just destroy the buildings that the Doozers erect, but they consume them. Literally consuming the resources of another culture and thinking little of it. The people that are working hard to build an infrastructure are trivialized and their work is consumed by hippies... there has to be some kind of rhetorical statement being made there. Then, we look at the Gorgs, the rich and agrarian group. They are portrayed as greedy and stupid; always being outsmarted by the agile hippie fraggles who steal their radishes.
No wonder my generation has little respect for the honorable professions of construction and agriculture... we were indoctrinated to believe that those workers are insignificant and ignorant!
PS - This is just based on my memory of the show and is a pretty shallow analysis. I was really just in a sort of bad mood when the theme song played on my Zune. It made me happy so I wanted to share the song... as I was watching the video is when I started thinking about all this other stuff...
Sunday, August 17, 2008
can't brag about me, can't forget me
I've been having trouble sleeping lately, which is pretty odd for me. I mean, it's not uncommon that I've had problems falling asleep in my past, but now I can't seem to stay asleep. I keep waking up fairly early. Now when I say early many of you will scoff since I mean about 8:30, and I guess that it won't really be a problem next week when I have to get up at that time to start teaching.
I went to bed last night at 3 AM, and I woke right up at about 6:45 this morning. I went back to sleep, but I had what I guess you'd call a nightmare. It was the first day of class, and I was doing my first day stuff in public speaking, but I was in the wrong room. I think the dream started with me finding out that I had been moved out of the good classroom up stairs and into one of the crappier ones in the basement (which is a true fear I have before classes begin; right now all of my classes are in good rooms, but things can always change), except it wasn't one of the rooms in the basement of Winston, it was one of the rooms in the basement of the 200 building from my old high school. Now, the 200 building was one of the oldest, most run down, and crappiest buildings at good ole WF-R HS. My students were acting just like a bunch of high schoolers act when a new substitute teacher walks in the door. It was insane. Complete disrespect. I began to introduce myself and the class and they started talking to each other, and just like high school the volume slowly increased; as one group talks louder the others get louder to compensate and before you know it there's a roar across the room. Nothing I tried would quit them down (after I woke up I even thought to myself of Y techniques I should have tired but didn't think of in the dream). I seem to remember arguing with them about something... I think grades, or how the class was set up. I was beginning to lose my cool and get irate when my boss, Christi walked in with this look on her face that said, "Dennis, what the hell are you doing in here?!" Then I started telling the class that if they didn't like the way things were set up then they should just drop, and that by tomorrow I'd have 25 more students trying to add the class to take their spots, but when I talked about that Christi tried to counter. Actually, I don't think she ever spoke, instead communicating with me through unhappy and disdainful looks of disapproval. I remember getting the message from her, in some psychic/nonverbal method, "Don't let them drop, the department needs all the money it can get. We really need these crappy students!!" I think it was about that time that I decided I couldn't deal with it and I head for the door. Just like magic, when I walked out the door of the classroom I woke up.
I guess I do still have some latent jitters surrounding the start of new semester. Not so much fears about the students or the types of groups I'll get, but fears about whether or not I'm respected in the department. I've been observed before and I've gotten outstanding marks from my observations, but I'm still afraid that one day someone will walk in and look at me with "What the hell are you doing" written across his or her face.
I need to leave the department. There are very few faculty there who really make me feel welcome. I understand where they're coming from though. The department is growing and they need fewer and fewer lecturers, and as a graduate from the program they want to be able to either brag about me or forget me. I don't think they can brag about me. I didn't go on to some prestigious doctoral program, and I guess working for them as a lecturer isn't a position they feel is good enough to brag about.
At orientation Dr. D said something to the extent of, 'don't get stuck in the busy high school hallway; afraid to move because of all the activity around you. Keep your head down and keep moving.' I felt like she was talking right to me. I'm stuck here in the hallway of NCSU, and I think they want me to move on. Although, the very next thing she said was that this should be our home and we should make ourselves comfortable here.
Honestly, I am very happy with what I do. I'd like to teach something else (and I don't know if I'll ever get that chance in this department), and I'd be happy staying here as long as they'd have a need for me, but I don't think they're happy with me around. They can't just forget me, I'm around all the time, and they can't really brag about me. After all, as a lecturer I get the distinct message of, 'You are replaceable.' The worst part is that I am. Every one's got a master's degree now...
On another note completely, I saw my Ex and her new bough(sp?) together for the first time this week. I'm not sure if they saw me or not... it doesn't really matter if they did. I was actually on what may or may not have been a date (why are things so complicated?) with a cute new girl in the department. We were sitting enjoying a popsicle and fun conversation when I saw them walk by in a very comfortable embrace... much like one I used share with her. Even though I thought that I was pretty good about all of this now, it still knocked the wind out of. It really felt like my heart stopped beating for a few seconds (not in the romantic way as much as the palpitatious way). There's a lot more I can, and kinda want to, say about all of this, but I've already wasted too much of my day on this post.
I'm supposed to go with the new girl to help get new kitten supplies (again not sure if this is a date; I could write a very long post about how this new girl is confusing me). So, that should be fun.
I'll try to have a happier post next time :)
I went to bed last night at 3 AM, and I woke right up at about 6:45 this morning. I went back to sleep, but I had what I guess you'd call a nightmare. It was the first day of class, and I was doing my first day stuff in public speaking, but I was in the wrong room. I think the dream started with me finding out that I had been moved out of the good classroom up stairs and into one of the crappier ones in the basement (which is a true fear I have before classes begin; right now all of my classes are in good rooms, but things can always change), except it wasn't one of the rooms in the basement of Winston, it was one of the rooms in the basement of the 200 building from my old high school. Now, the 200 building was one of the oldest, most run down, and crappiest buildings at good ole WF-R HS. My students were acting just like a bunch of high schoolers act when a new substitute teacher walks in the door. It was insane. Complete disrespect. I began to introduce myself and the class and they started talking to each other, and just like high school the volume slowly increased; as one group talks louder the others get louder to compensate and before you know it there's a roar across the room. Nothing I tried would quit them down (after I woke up I even thought to myself of Y techniques I should have tired but didn't think of in the dream). I seem to remember arguing with them about something... I think grades, or how the class was set up. I was beginning to lose my cool and get irate when my boss, Christi walked in with this look on her face that said, "Dennis, what the hell are you doing in here?!" Then I started telling the class that if they didn't like the way things were set up then they should just drop, and that by tomorrow I'd have 25 more students trying to add the class to take their spots, but when I talked about that Christi tried to counter. Actually, I don't think she ever spoke, instead communicating with me through unhappy and disdainful looks of disapproval. I remember getting the message from her, in some psychic/nonverbal method, "Don't let them drop, the department needs all the money it can get. We really need these crappy students!!" I think it was about that time that I decided I couldn't deal with it and I head for the door. Just like magic, when I walked out the door of the classroom I woke up.
I guess I do still have some latent jitters surrounding the start of new semester. Not so much fears about the students or the types of groups I'll get, but fears about whether or not I'm respected in the department. I've been observed before and I've gotten outstanding marks from my observations, but I'm still afraid that one day someone will walk in and look at me with "What the hell are you doing" written across his or her face.
I need to leave the department. There are very few faculty there who really make me feel welcome. I understand where they're coming from though. The department is growing and they need fewer and fewer lecturers, and as a graduate from the program they want to be able to either brag about me or forget me. I don't think they can brag about me. I didn't go on to some prestigious doctoral program, and I guess working for them as a lecturer isn't a position they feel is good enough to brag about.
At orientation Dr. D said something to the extent of, 'don't get stuck in the busy high school hallway; afraid to move because of all the activity around you. Keep your head down and keep moving.' I felt like she was talking right to me. I'm stuck here in the hallway of NCSU, and I think they want me to move on. Although, the very next thing she said was that this should be our home and we should make ourselves comfortable here.
Honestly, I am very happy with what I do. I'd like to teach something else (and I don't know if I'll ever get that chance in this department), and I'd be happy staying here as long as they'd have a need for me, but I don't think they're happy with me around. They can't just forget me, I'm around all the time, and they can't really brag about me. After all, as a lecturer I get the distinct message of, 'You are replaceable.' The worst part is that I am. Every one's got a master's degree now...
On another note completely, I saw my Ex and her new bough(sp?) together for the first time this week. I'm not sure if they saw me or not... it doesn't really matter if they did. I was actually on what may or may not have been a date (why are things so complicated?) with a cute new girl in the department. We were sitting enjoying a popsicle and fun conversation when I saw them walk by in a very comfortable embrace... much like one I used share with her. Even though I thought that I was pretty good about all of this now, it still knocked the wind out of. It really felt like my heart stopped beating for a few seconds (not in the romantic way as much as the palpitatious way). There's a lot more I can, and kinda want to, say about all of this, but I've already wasted too much of my day on this post.
I'm supposed to go with the new girl to help get new kitten supplies (again not sure if this is a date; I could write a very long post about how this new girl is confusing me). So, that should be fun.
I'll try to have a happier post next time :)
Friday, August 15, 2008
Glory Hole'n...
I haven't posted as much this week. I keep getting wrapped up in the Olympics, and I've gone out a little more that usual.
I went to see Tropic Thunder; Ben Stiller's new movie. It was okay, but it's no Zoolander (I don't think he'll ever top that one for me). Robert Downey Jr, a certain scientologist, and all the cameos are really what make that movie worth watching.
I'll actually keep tonight's post short... mainly because I can't even make fun of what I've embedded below. Seriously Fox, we're actually modeling our new game shows after the Japanese? Japanese game shows are supposed to be overdubbed in a mocking fashion (thank you MXC) not replicated in the US. I saw this commercial tonight, and I tried to find the whole thing, but this was all I could get at the moment. Send me a link if you find the full commercial. Enjoy.
I went to see Tropic Thunder; Ben Stiller's new movie. It was okay, but it's no Zoolander (I don't think he'll ever top that one for me). Robert Downey Jr, a certain scientologist, and all the cameos are really what make that movie worth watching.
I'll actually keep tonight's post short... mainly because I can't even make fun of what I've embedded below. Seriously Fox, we're actually modeling our new game shows after the Japanese? Japanese game shows are supposed to be overdubbed in a mocking fashion (thank you MXC) not replicated in the US. I saw this commercial tonight, and I tried to find the whole thing, but this was all I could get at the moment. Send me a link if you find the full commercial. Enjoy.
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Butter for my Bread (say it fast... its rhythmic)
Much has happened in the past day or so... I'll try to be brief, but I know that's not my forte.
I slept in pretty late Tuesday, thanks to an exorbitantly long and late phone conversation with a certain unavailable, cute, feisty photographer (... who I am very happy being just friends with :p ). Then I proceeded to waste much of the day on my new acquisition Guitar Hero III. I know, I know... I've fallen victim to GH, but it's so much easier to jam with that than it is to find a group to play real music with.
I was inside so long yesterday that I felt a little sick when I left for Inga's, but I still had a good lesson/work out there (except for killer cramp I got in my side). Again the girl I work with said she was going to come, and again she did not. So far she's developing a flaky reputation with me. We shall see if she still want to practice some after our classes tomorrow. BUT, back to Inga's, my bota fogos are not as wrong as I thought the were. Last week she was leaving out the & (pelvic action) on purpose to emphasize the peeling of the foot. This week she came up to Aksel and I specificly and told us we should be putting the & in. So, I was still not rolling through the foot enough, so it's good that I focused on that for a week, but it was a relief to know that I wasn't way off. I feel like I got a lot of good work on my whisks last night too, really getting the pelvic action well. Hard to describe in words as I'm not at that level of understanding yet, but I could probably show it. I always end up partnering with the weird old ladies that are there. It's not fair, Aksel always seems to get some young girl who knows what she's doing. Last night I was with an older woman who kept making eyes at me the whole time. It was really awkward. The more she started to get into the samba action, the more loose she got, and more she was looking at me like a dirty little old woman. She wasn't that old though... reminded me of a librarian, but not the sexy librarian of fantasy. More like the mean librarian in elementary school who always shushes you.Overall it was a good lesson.
Afterwards I met Nick and Nicky at their place and we went to Sushi Blues for HALF PRICE SUSHI!!!! We didn't get as early as we should have, so we had to wait a while to get a table. Not really because there were a lot of people there, but the ones that were weren't leaving. They just sat around watching the Olympics. We got a table though and I pigged out! I ate three rolls all by myself! A rainbow roll, a santana maki, and an across the street carmen roll. I finished them all! We sat and watched the Gymnastics for a while too. I'm sure all those girls are way too young, but one is pretty hot, and she kept making mistakes. It was a bad day for her, but she can take solace in the fact that she's the hottest on the team (UPDATE - I checked and she's almost 21, so I can totally check her out and say she's hot). Really fun time, but it was midnight by the time we were done, so we had to scoot to get Nicky home so she could get up in time for work.
Then I woke up this morning in kind of a gloomy mood; it's a gloomy day. I watched some Olympic swimming and sat around in a haze of gloom. That all dissipated when I met up with Matt for lunch. We talked about everything ranging from the Olympics to Guitar Hero to what our old drummer's up to now and the conflict with Georgia and Russia. I felt in a much better mood after lunch, and I drove out to Jerry's Art-a-rama and got some canvases. They guy gave me like 50% discount since they didn't have the size I wanted.
So I might paint a little today, or maybe I'll play Guitar Hero for a bit, but I'm really looking forward to tonight when I'm going to watch Tropic Thunder! We'll see if it's worth the protesting...
I slept in pretty late Tuesday, thanks to an exorbitantly long and late phone conversation with a certain unavailable, cute, feisty photographer (... who I am very happy being just friends with :p ). Then I proceeded to waste much of the day on my new acquisition Guitar Hero III. I know, I know... I've fallen victim to GH, but it's so much easier to jam with that than it is to find a group to play real music with.
I was inside so long yesterday that I felt a little sick when I left for Inga's, but I still had a good lesson/work out there (except for killer cramp I got in my side). Again the girl I work with said she was going to come, and again she did not. So far she's developing a flaky reputation with me. We shall see if she still want to practice some after our classes tomorrow. BUT, back to Inga's, my bota fogos are not as wrong as I thought the were. Last week she was leaving out the & (pelvic action) on purpose to emphasize the peeling of the foot. This week she came up to Aksel and I specificly and told us we should be putting the & in. So, I was still not rolling through the foot enough, so it's good that I focused on that for a week, but it was a relief to know that I wasn't way off. I feel like I got a lot of good work on my whisks last night too, really getting the pelvic action well. Hard to describe in words as I'm not at that level of understanding yet, but I could probably show it. I always end up partnering with the weird old ladies that are there. It's not fair, Aksel always seems to get some young girl who knows what she's doing. Last night I was with an older woman who kept making eyes at me the whole time. It was really awkward. The more she started to get into the samba action, the more loose she got, and more she was looking at me like a dirty little old woman. She wasn't that old though... reminded me of a librarian, but not the sexy librarian of fantasy. More like the mean librarian in elementary school who always shushes you.Overall it was a good lesson.
Afterwards I met Nick and Nicky at their place and we went to Sushi Blues for HALF PRICE SUSHI!!!! We didn't get as early as we should have, so we had to wait a while to get a table. Not really because there were a lot of people there, but the ones that were weren't leaving. They just sat around watching the Olympics. We got a table though and I pigged out! I ate three rolls all by myself! A rainbow roll, a santana maki, and an across the street carmen roll. I finished them all! We sat and watched the Gymnastics for a while too. I'm sure all those girls are way too young, but one is pretty hot, and she kept making mistakes. It was a bad day for her, but she can take solace in the fact that she's the hottest on the team (UPDATE - I checked and she's almost 21, so I can totally check her out and say she's hot). Really fun time, but it was midnight by the time we were done, so we had to scoot to get Nicky home so she could get up in time for work.
Then I woke up this morning in kind of a gloomy mood; it's a gloomy day. I watched some Olympic swimming and sat around in a haze of gloom. That all dissipated when I met up with Matt for lunch. We talked about everything ranging from the Olympics to Guitar Hero to what our old drummer's up to now and the conflict with Georgia and Russia. I felt in a much better mood after lunch, and I drove out to Jerry's Art-a-rama and got some canvases. They guy gave me like 50% discount since they didn't have the size I wanted.
So I might paint a little today, or maybe I'll play Guitar Hero for a bit, but I'm really looking forward to tonight when I'm going to watch Tropic Thunder! We'll see if it's worth the protesting...
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
That's Life
This has become my new theme song. I am not gonna let things get me down, my heart won't buy it. Unlike ole blue eyes there, come July, I'm not gonna roll up in a ball and die... I'm gonna wait at least until December :)
Monday, August 11, 2008
Are age and happiness inversely proportional?
For the artist, this is a character with a full back story, that I must admit I have not read. What I find interesting is the expressions. Does this piece say that we lose happiness as we age, or perhaps that giddy excitement is for the youth? My visual rhetoric professor always said that intent is less important than perceptions. So, while the artist is more than welcome to add her two cents, I want to know what you, the readers think. Try to base your thoughts on only the image; create your own meaning for it. I don't want this to be a critique on the drawing itself (remember my BE NICE rule), just the meaning derived from it. This might be something fun, and it can give all my lurkers a chance to come out and say hi :)
Progression II by ~Snicks on deviantART
Progression II by ~Snicks on deviantART
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Sunday Morning Coming Down
There's something in a Sunday that makes the body feel alone...
This is one of my all time favorite songs... ever. It's even better when you think about how Whistler from Blade (Kris Kristofferson) wrote it.
This is one of my all time favorite songs... ever. It's even better when you think about how Whistler from Blade (Kris Kristofferson) wrote it.
Saturday, August 9, 2008
It's been a LONG day.
Well, I just finished my first dance challenge at A Step to Gold, and I think I had fun overall. I know that Carol and her family (her husband and sister were spectators) absolutely loved it. Honestly, I'm quite pleased and proud of her. She didn't let the "competitive" atmosphere get to her. She just did her bast and had fun dancing, which is exactly what I told her you're supposed to do on the day of. And she did a good job with her dancing also! Many of the other instructors that have been working at the studio a while were all amazed at how well she's dancing now. She had been taking lessons at the studio for a long time, but the other instructors had pretty much written her off as 'bad', and didn't think she could ever improve... well I guess we showed them! She placed first in just about every event we danced in... although I'm pretty sure we were the only couple in our age/difficulty category in just about every dance. It was hilarious to me during the awards ceremony; every couple there got first place in every dance they competed in... what a joke. But for Carol, it was great. She felt vindicated, and she felt like she'd earned it... maybe that's the point.
I can't call this a competition. If I did, it would have been the most poorly organized competition I have ever seen or participated in. Set aside the fact that it didn't even start until 45 min after it was supposed to, but half the events we were registered for (and paid for) weren't listed in the heats. And they couldn't get us back into those events until after they had passed, so they stuck us in with other categories... I don't know how they judged us against the couples that had already danced. Oh, that's another thing... only two judges, and they were the pro couple that did the showcase, so they both probably have a similar perspective, so really it was like having one judge. Although I guess it doesn't really matter when the heats are set up so that no one on the floor is competing against anyone else on the floor. There were never anymore than 5 couples on the floor and each was in a different category, or they were dancing uncontested... I guess just for fun? (They were given a score out of 100, Carol's scores ranged from 93-96... pretty good for her first time out)
The worst part was when I was finished dancing for the day and became a spectator. Imagine the worst senior events, with all low quality (but gold level) smooth and rhythm (Only like one couple did any international... and the 'pro' still lead American timing.) dancing. Instead of just being a few heats of this, it's ALL DAY LONG!!! It's a good thing there weren't razor blades around because I would have killed myself from a thousand cuts. The worst part of it is that they don't even know. They have no idea what real dancing looks like! They see these "pros" (which only one or two were decent, gold technique, dancers) and they fawn over them! People look at me and think I'm some crazy amazing dancer, and when they tell me I just laugh at them and say 'you don't even know how much I suck.'
Bunches of old ladies in outfits they shouldn't be wearing, and there's no hot younger ones walkin around to balance things out... it's only old ones, everywhere! There was this cute, feisty photographer who kept asking me to dance, and kept flirting with me, and loved it when I was flirting back. Then, later at the social dance, she introduces me to her boyfriend. I mean, we were pretty much all over each other dancing on the floor, in front of this random guy, then random guy is her boyfriend (ok, maybe not all over each other, but pretty darn touchy feely). What the hell. It wasn't even like, 'This is my boyfriend" it was just, "This is Craig." (or whatever his name was) I had to figure it out, and then ask to make sure later on. Apparently she's very happy with him, but did enjoy flirting with me as much if not more than dancing with me. That's how it always works out... the cute and feisty girls are taken, and you have to figure it out on your own.
The real Pro's show was pretty good. You could tell that their titles were probably won about a decade ago, and I've seen much better shows before, but for this crowd they were amazing. They did five dances. She had big 'ol boobies and a lot of cleavage, so that was a bonus.
The thing about them was that they hung around afterwards and gave feedback to some of the dancers, even though they're giving privates tomorrow, it was like they were giving free privates for a while tonight. So I sort of lurked a bit and listened in to get some info. Most of the stuff they were saying was the same stuff I would have told the 'pro' and his student, but they did give one little bit on info that I found helpful. When thinking about compression, I've been thinking about the compression of the muscles in the back, and they talked about compression into the floor and bone compression. I'm not sure about bone compression, but into the floor is important. Inga has said before to settle into the heel, pushing into the floor, but I guess I was just at the right point in my dancing to actually hear the concept of floor compression and understand it.
I've been typing up a storm, so I think I'm done. They're doing some workshops in the morning... I might go to their samba, just to hear how they talk about the action...
I can't call this a competition. If I did, it would have been the most poorly organized competition I have ever seen or participated in. Set aside the fact that it didn't even start until 45 min after it was supposed to, but half the events we were registered for (and paid for) weren't listed in the heats. And they couldn't get us back into those events until after they had passed, so they stuck us in with other categories... I don't know how they judged us against the couples that had already danced. Oh, that's another thing... only two judges, and they were the pro couple that did the showcase, so they both probably have a similar perspective, so really it was like having one judge. Although I guess it doesn't really matter when the heats are set up so that no one on the floor is competing against anyone else on the floor. There were never anymore than 5 couples on the floor and each was in a different category, or they were dancing uncontested... I guess just for fun? (They were given a score out of 100, Carol's scores ranged from 93-96... pretty good for her first time out)
The worst part was when I was finished dancing for the day and became a spectator. Imagine the worst senior events, with all low quality (but gold level) smooth and rhythm (Only like one couple did any international... and the 'pro' still lead American timing.) dancing. Instead of just being a few heats of this, it's ALL DAY LONG!!! It's a good thing there weren't razor blades around because I would have killed myself from a thousand cuts. The worst part of it is that they don't even know. They have no idea what real dancing looks like! They see these "pros" (which only one or two were decent, gold technique, dancers) and they fawn over them! People look at me and think I'm some crazy amazing dancer, and when they tell me I just laugh at them and say 'you don't even know how much I suck.'
Bunches of old ladies in outfits they shouldn't be wearing, and there's no hot younger ones walkin around to balance things out... it's only old ones, everywhere! There was this cute, feisty photographer who kept asking me to dance, and kept flirting with me, and loved it when I was flirting back. Then, later at the social dance, she introduces me to her boyfriend. I mean, we were pretty much all over each other dancing on the floor, in front of this random guy, then random guy is her boyfriend (ok, maybe not all over each other, but pretty darn touchy feely). What the hell. It wasn't even like, 'This is my boyfriend" it was just, "This is Craig." (or whatever his name was) I had to figure it out, and then ask to make sure later on. Apparently she's very happy with him, but did enjoy flirting with me as much if not more than dancing with me. That's how it always works out... the cute and feisty girls are taken, and you have to figure it out on your own.
The real Pro's show was pretty good. You could tell that their titles were probably won about a decade ago, and I've seen much better shows before, but for this crowd they were amazing. They did five dances. She had big 'ol boobies and a lot of cleavage, so that was a bonus.
The thing about them was that they hung around afterwards and gave feedback to some of the dancers, even though they're giving privates tomorrow, it was like they were giving free privates for a while tonight. So I sort of lurked a bit and listened in to get some info. Most of the stuff they were saying was the same stuff I would have told the 'pro' and his student, but they did give one little bit on info that I found helpful. When thinking about compression, I've been thinking about the compression of the muscles in the back, and they talked about compression into the floor and bone compression. I'm not sure about bone compression, but into the floor is important. Inga has said before to settle into the heel, pushing into the floor, but I guess I was just at the right point in my dancing to actually hear the concept of floor compression and understand it.
I've been typing up a storm, so I think I'm done. They're doing some workshops in the morning... I might go to their samba, just to hear how they talk about the action...
Friday, August 8, 2008
Lunch with Ray!!! and I've gone International!
We're going to Cooper's BBQ. I'm really stoked. He's on his way now, so I'll tell more about it later...
Oh, and I saw that I just had my first International hit on the blog! Someone in Europe is checking up on me :)
Oh, and I saw that I just had my first International hit on the blog! Someone in Europe is checking up on me :)
Thursday, August 7, 2008
I'm Intimidating
I must be. I've had two women at the studio tell me now that my first impression to them was one of intimidation. One of which absolutely loves me now and the other... well she sort of intimidates me. But what am I supposed to do?
It's a fine line to walk. I don't wanna (and can't) come across as the stereotypical flamboyant homo dance instructor that all the women find endearing and all the men are afraid of. I also don't want to be perceived as some jerk who thinks he's better than you. Now to be honest, she didn't know that I was an instructor at the time, and I was in an 'I'm new and I need to demonstrate my qualifications' mode; so she really thought I was just some jerk telling her to change something. But then I was told just how different I am from the, very popular, bubbly/happy female instructor... all from someone who's never even taken a class form me. In actual group classes I'm crackin jokes left and right and make things really relaxed. Maybe I need to act a little more fruit-salad to put the ladies at ease... but that might hurt my private lesson business...
It's a fine line to walk. I don't wanna (and can't) come across as the stereotypical flamboyant homo dance instructor that all the women find endearing and all the men are afraid of. I also don't want to be perceived as some jerk who thinks he's better than you. Now to be honest, she didn't know that I was an instructor at the time, and I was in an 'I'm new and I need to demonstrate my qualifications' mode; so she really thought I was just some jerk telling her to change something. But then I was told just how different I am from the, very popular, bubbly/happy female instructor... all from someone who's never even taken a class form me. In actual group classes I'm crackin jokes left and right and make things really relaxed. Maybe I need to act a little more fruit-salad to put the ladies at ease... but that might hurt my private lesson business...
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Action Christ!
Way to go Wal-mart!
Gross...
I was in Lowe's looking at light fixtures with the family, and we started walking around and got to the washer/dryer area. Well, the washer/dryer area is right next to a little display of a bath tub, sink, and toilet. I was checking out the fixtures and thought, 'hmm that's a nice looking toilet... seems like it would use less water, I wonder what it looks like under the lid.'
So I lift the lid and... Que music of shrieking horrific disgust... IT HAD BEEN USED!!!!
Seriously. The was some of both in there; number 1 and number 2. I closed the lid, told my brother not to look, and started to walk away as quickly as I could. That's gonna be a bad day for the guy who has to clean that up.
So I lift the lid and... Que music of shrieking horrific disgust... IT HAD BEEN USED!!!!
Seriously. The was some of both in there; number 1 and number 2. I closed the lid, told my brother not to look, and started to walk away as quickly as I could. That's gonna be a bad day for the guy who has to clean that up.
The Boredom is killer
So I think one of the worst things about newly being single is the boredom. I'm bored all the time! You go from always having someone to spend time and hangout with, to pretty much always being alone or always trying to find some one to hang with. One of the cool things about having a significant other is that you don't really even have to be doing anything at all; just having them in the room with you is often enough to make you happy. Which makes it all the more obvious that, after the break up, when you're sitting around alone you're not happy. Somehow having that person with you makes everything better; shared experiences are what life is about. At least they are for me.
Nick made an observation and pointed out that I tend live me life through the framework of who's with me; that I focus on the shared experience rather than the individual. I can't quite remember how he put it, so I may be a little off. Apparently, every story I tell (and I tell a lot of stories) begins with who participated with me, and every experience I tell about is remembered as a shared experience. I was kinda happy when he pointed that out. I've said before that life is more about the relationships you make than the things you have, and I don't know if I've always followed that philosophy. Nick's observation means, that in a small way I am practicing what I preach.
Back to point now... for me it doesn't matter what I'm doing as long as I've got someone (preferably someone special) to share it with. Now that I've lost my primary sharing partner, everything seems more boring... especially when I don't have anything to do (except reflect on the all the fun times I've had with people in the past).
Nick made an observation and pointed out that I tend live me life through the framework of who's with me; that I focus on the shared experience rather than the individual. I can't quite remember how he put it, so I may be a little off. Apparently, every story I tell (and I tell a lot of stories) begins with who participated with me, and every experience I tell about is remembered as a shared experience. I was kinda happy when he pointed that out. I've said before that life is more about the relationships you make than the things you have, and I don't know if I've always followed that philosophy. Nick's observation means, that in a small way I am practicing what I preach.
Back to point now... for me it doesn't matter what I'm doing as long as I've got someone (preferably someone special) to share it with. Now that I've lost my primary sharing partner, everything seems more boring... especially when I don't have anything to do (except reflect on the all the fun times I've had with people in the past).
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
AHH!!!
My bota fogos are wrong! Ugh... at least half of it is wrong, and the fact that the first half is wrong is now throwing off my second half. Basically I've been doing the first part just like the second part, well now I know to do the first eighth or quater very much like the first eighth or quater of a rumba walk (without the compression/settle). Straightening that forward leg before the heel leaves the ground; leg rise then foot rise (I was rising with the foot, then the leg before). Although I shouldn't really use the term rise since that would imply fall... but I can't think of better terminology right now. Then the second part is the same as I've been doing it, but with a smaller step so that I can get more hip action, and I need to put more/faster rotation on the 'a'.
Plus I really noticed how bad I am about not going diagonal enough with those... it makes a huge difference for travelling down the floor.
This revelation of leg rise first has thrown my mind into a craze considering the implications to crisado's walks...
Plus I really noticed how bad I am about not going diagonal enough with those... it makes a huge difference for travelling down the floor.
This revelation of leg rise first has thrown my mind into a craze considering the implications to crisado's walks...
I have made a decision of epic importance...
My favorite album, for now, from start to finish, beginning to end is...
ZWAN - Mary Star of the Sea
It's simply one of the best records to listen to all the way through. It's done so well; it takes you on an emotional journey, and at the end you just feel pretty darn content. If you don't have this album I strongly encourage you to get it.
This is their big radio single, but check out some of their other stuff on youtube, like Lyric and Jesus, I. Plus, I've always thought chick bass players were extra hott and this band gets bonus points for her (watch some of the live stuff where she's showin some leg...).
I promise I don't have a thing for Billy Corgan... but now we get before and after bald videos :)
ZWAN - Mary Star of the Sea
It's simply one of the best records to listen to all the way through. It's done so well; it takes you on an emotional journey, and at the end you just feel pretty darn content. If you don't have this album I strongly encourage you to get it.
This is their big radio single, but check out some of their other stuff on youtube, like Lyric and Jesus, I. Plus, I've always thought chick bass players were extra hott and this band gets bonus points for her (watch some of the live stuff where she's showin some leg...).
I promise I don't have a thing for Billy Corgan... but now we get before and after bald videos :)
Monday, August 4, 2008
my essence is foot pain
Well my blog is a week old now, and this is the 20th post. I guess I've been busy going a little blog crazy. I think this has been very good for me. It has helped me to deal with some things I'm feeling and come to grips with a few realizations about myself. Plus, it's given me an outlet to share to silly crap that pops into my mind (I'm trying to add some fun A/V content here and there too).
I like the comments, keep them coming, and don't be afraid to disagree with me and start a discussion. If you have something you want to add, please say so. Also if you have some content you'd like to contribute I'll try and link to it in a post for you, and if you have a blog you'd like me to share I'll make a section for those in the margin once I get a few.
I think I've made 78 cents from google adsense so far. Apparently, google's fancy software has boiled my blog down to foot pain. Out of everything I've talked about it, it thinks I'm publishing material for people with aching feet. Maybe I am; any of you dancers experiencing chronic foot pain? Then follow the links and get some help... seriously, the more you click those links the more change I'll earn. Although they only pay out when it hits $100, so at something like 10 cents a click it'll take a while.
I cleaned out the refridgerator... mostly. Alan's tupperware is still in there. I kinda want to just throw the whole thing out without having to open and clean it.
If you need closure on anything else I've talked about over the last week, let me know and I'll write about it.
:)
I like the comments, keep them coming, and don't be afraid to disagree with me and start a discussion. If you have something you want to add, please say so. Also if you have some content you'd like to contribute I'll try and link to it in a post for you, and if you have a blog you'd like me to share I'll make a section for those in the margin once I get a few.
I think I've made 78 cents from google adsense so far. Apparently, google's fancy software has boiled my blog down to foot pain. Out of everything I've talked about it, it thinks I'm publishing material for people with aching feet. Maybe I am; any of you dancers experiencing chronic foot pain? Then follow the links and get some help... seriously, the more you click those links the more change I'll earn. Although they only pay out when it hits $100, so at something like 10 cents a click it'll take a while.
I cleaned out the refridgerator... mostly. Alan's tupperware is still in there. I kinda want to just throw the whole thing out without having to open and clean it.
If you need closure on anything else I've talked about over the last week, let me know and I'll write about it.
:)
Sanitary... no big whoop
So I had a relaxing 24 hour period at the beach with my buddy Nick. While we were there I made it a point to check out the Sanitary Fish Market in Morehead. I've heard about this place for years. It seemed like all the popular kids in highschool had a t-shirt form this place, like it was some kind of status symbol telling me that, 'yes, my family can afford to take week long beach trips over the summer, and we eat at fancy seafood restaraunts, all while you have to sit at home or work all summer.'
Well now I've got my own little place at the beach (that I rarely get too because I can never seem to find anyone available to go with). My brother goes out there more than I do, and after a few trips he starts raving about Sanitary...'Dennis, you have to go there, they've got great lunch specials!... I think I'm getting mom a t-shirt, do you thinki she'll like a t-shirt from there?"
Then Nick kept talking about the place too, 'We went there every year when I was kid. I remember that place being so cool. I loved that place.'
So we go. To me, it just looks like every other seafood place at the beach, just like 100 other places I've been to. Its an older place, hardwood floors, old wooden tables and chairs, and the menu looks pretty simple. Even the prices look to be in line with your typical beach seafood place. I ordered the shrimp lunch special. I got a small plate of shrimp, some greenbeans (which were really good), and some steamed brockely (which was not so good). It all just seemed average to me... no big whoop.
But to hear Nick talk about the place, and tell the stories of how he went there with his family as a child... I could tell, that in his eyes, the place was still pretty damn cool. So I think that's what's special about the place; the memories it envokes. I think people go there as children, and associate it with the wonder and awesome happiness that the beach seems to grant children. They grow up holding on the the memory of that feeling and association, so they go back as adults to touch the happiness of childhood, and they take their own kids and pass on the association. It's not about the restaraunt itself; it's about the memories, and using the restaraunt as a conduit to guide those memories and emotions from our pasts to our present.
At least that's how explain most people's fascination with it. I don't know why my brother likes it so much.
Me, I'd rather eat at the farmer's market. It's a lot better and a hell of a lot cheaper.
Well now I've got my own little place at the beach (that I rarely get too because I can never seem to find anyone available to go with). My brother goes out there more than I do, and after a few trips he starts raving about Sanitary...'Dennis, you have to go there, they've got great lunch specials!... I think I'm getting mom a t-shirt, do you thinki she'll like a t-shirt from there?"
Then Nick kept talking about the place too, 'We went there every year when I was kid. I remember that place being so cool. I loved that place.'
So we go. To me, it just looks like every other seafood place at the beach, just like 100 other places I've been to. Its an older place, hardwood floors, old wooden tables and chairs, and the menu looks pretty simple. Even the prices look to be in line with your typical beach seafood place. I ordered the shrimp lunch special. I got a small plate of shrimp, some greenbeans (which were really good), and some steamed brockely (which was not so good). It all just seemed average to me... no big whoop.
But to hear Nick talk about the place, and tell the stories of how he went there with his family as a child... I could tell, that in his eyes, the place was still pretty damn cool. So I think that's what's special about the place; the memories it envokes. I think people go there as children, and associate it with the wonder and awesome happiness that the beach seems to grant children. They grow up holding on the the memory of that feeling and association, so they go back as adults to touch the happiness of childhood, and they take their own kids and pass on the association. It's not about the restaraunt itself; it's about the memories, and using the restaraunt as a conduit to guide those memories and emotions from our pasts to our present.
At least that's how explain most people's fascination with it. I don't know why my brother likes it so much.
Me, I'd rather eat at the farmer's market. It's a lot better and a hell of a lot cheaper.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
I'm off the wire
I'm headin out to the beach and disconnecting for a day or so... although I could still post something from my phone if I feel like I really need to share.
I keep picking at it
After the movie, I was driving to meet up with folks at char-grill, when I was hit with a sudden burst of loneliness. I'm not quite sure why; maybe it was all the sword play in the movie. I thought of swords, then meat on a sword, then the steakhouse I didn't go to and the person I wasn't smiling at. I can't say that I wouldn't have gotten lonesome regardless, but I wouldn't have had that path there had I not been pickin' at my scab. Why do I e-stalk... all it does is give me fuel for feeling; feeling things I don't like feeling. If I don't read her blog, then I don't see how happy she is without me, and then I'm not reminded of how unhappy she was with me. If I didn't leave my AIM up I wouldn't know that she was idle all night long, and I wouldn't think of the possible reasons that she could have stayed out all night... actually I tend to dwell on only one possibility. And if face book didn't exist, I'd never have to see my replacement.
The triumphs and tribulations of living 'on the wire' as Dr. Wiley always put it. Instant access to information is an awesome thing, but it can have its downsides. I'm going a little too free form here... back to point now.
I'm not a good man. I'm jealous and I'm petty. I want to be gallivanting with an attractive, exciting, 'new' love. I don't want to feel lonely, I want to feel secure, but then when I do... am I happy then? I don't know. Maybe I turn off my feelings because I can't understand a single damn one of them. What happened to me? I used to be in close contact with my emotions, but as I get older the more I become a typical man. Ugh...
I sat next to Nick and Nicky in the theater, and I noticed that pretty quick after she got there Nick and she were holding hands. Now remember, I'm a bad man who's pretty damn self centered at times, and I see this and wonder... did Nick take hold of her hand because, in small part, of me and my situation? I'm pretty sure I've talked to him about how I, apparently, wasn't doing enough hand holding. Maybe that was a little reminder for him, 'hey, maybe I should hold Nicky's hand more here and there.' If so, then great. My folly is to their benefit. Or, maybe they always hold hands and I just haven't noticed before... I talked with Nick a little about my sudden bout with alone-ness, and I don't remember what he said, but it helped. I don't think he really understands everything, but he tries to and that's the important part.
I just keep thinking of a Ben Folds line... "One advice. Girls need attention." Although it seems that I was deafer than all... and now she's getting the attention she deserves, and me... well I need to try and disconnect; get off the wire a little more. Stop picking at these wounds and let them heal.
The triumphs and tribulations of living 'on the wire' as Dr. Wiley always put it. Instant access to information is an awesome thing, but it can have its downsides. I'm going a little too free form here... back to point now.
I'm not a good man. I'm jealous and I'm petty. I want to be gallivanting with an attractive, exciting, 'new' love. I don't want to feel lonely, I want to feel secure, but then when I do... am I happy then? I don't know. Maybe I turn off my feelings because I can't understand a single damn one of them. What happened to me? I used to be in close contact with my emotions, but as I get older the more I become a typical man. Ugh...
I sat next to Nick and Nicky in the theater, and I noticed that pretty quick after she got there Nick and she were holding hands. Now remember, I'm a bad man who's pretty damn self centered at times, and I see this and wonder... did Nick take hold of her hand because, in small part, of me and my situation? I'm pretty sure I've talked to him about how I, apparently, wasn't doing enough hand holding. Maybe that was a little reminder for him, 'hey, maybe I should hold Nicky's hand more here and there.' If so, then great. My folly is to their benefit. Or, maybe they always hold hands and I just haven't noticed before... I talked with Nick a little about my sudden bout with alone-ness, and I don't remember what he said, but it helped. I don't think he really understands everything, but he tries to and that's the important part.
I just keep thinking of a Ben Folds line... "One advice. Girls need attention." Although it seems that I was deafer than all... and now she's getting the attention she deserves, and me... well I need to try and disconnect; get off the wire a little more. Stop picking at these wounds and let them heal.
Kung Fu Mummy should not have escpaed its tomb
It was awful!!! It was just plain horrible. I mean, its a mummy movie and so I expect it to be cheesy, like the other two before it. This movie, however, goes beyond cheesy to just plain bad. There were several things that I could tell were meant to be funny, and yet the entire audience was silent... crickets didn't even chirp. "My ass is on fire?! Smack my ass, smACK MY ASS!"... nothing. The worst part was the quality of the acting. Terrible. Rally bad. Maybe it was this bad in the first two and the chemistry between Rachel Weiss and Brenden Frazier was enough to hide it, but without her it was painful to watch. Literally. I felt a little bad when I noticed, for the second time, that I let out a sigh of pain. Nick was sitting next to me and he looked at me like, 'sorry dude, but I'm having fun'. There are too many cliche interactions between all the characters... I know I should be giving specific examples, but I don't want to remember them.
I did not enjoy that movie.
I did not enjoy that movie.
Friday, August 1, 2008
Three important rules for breaking up...
Did he say to wash your hair once every two weeks?!... and what's date insurance and where do I get it?
It's got such a classic 90's sound.
It's Friday... and it's kinda nice that I don't have anything planned to do today other than teach my class, and today is a speech day so all I have to do is watch and grade. I like chill days.
I'm looking for a beach companion for the weekend. You don't have to look in a bikini, but it would be an added bonus (... you probably shouldn't have clicked that link...).
So yesterday was pretty good. I went on campus and watched speeches, which are about as good as I can expect for a summer session. I had lunch with my Mom, we went to a decent little pizza/italian place (although her sandwich looked a heck of a lot better than my slice of pizza. I hadn't seen my Mom in a while. Even though she's cane free now she still walks with a bit of a limp.
Last night I went in the dance studio and had my two hours with Carol. She has complete faith in me and leaves everything in my hands. I keep trying to remind her that she's the boss, but... anyway, I'm really happy with her progress. I'm throwing some really difficult concepts at her, and I'm being just as critical with her as I've ever been, but some how its all fun. She's amazed when I can sense that her knee is bent (even though its clear to me that its bent from how she's standing on it) and I'm like some guru to her. It really makes me wonder just how much of a crappy dancer you can be and get away with teaching dance at a studio like this...
After the lesson Janet asked me to hang around so she wouldn't be the only one to answer the phones if they started ringing wildly (they never did). So I went in and helped out with Adrianne's class. She is probably one of, if not the, best dancers at the studio. She's got a background in general dance, and she teaches class just like its a tap/jazz/hip hop class. She starts the music and loudly yells out '5..6... 5678 with a country girl twang. I always forget about the differences between ballroom dancers and dancers... Her students seem to love her, so I guess that speaks the most about her. She's a somewhat attractive, petite little girl, and I don't think I've got her figured out yet. It seems like everything is just a little too interesting to her, like she really doesn't care but feigns interest like a good southern girl should... but like I said, her students lover.
Most of the class went out to this fancy bar on 6-forks... can't remember the name, its in peachtree plaza, and they invited us along. I'm not sure this was the case, but I got the impression Adrianne wanted me to go so she wouldn't be the only young person there. It was fun, apparently this is one of this later-middle aged groups who must have partied a lot in their youth. They go for a drink after every class, this place is the best spot for mojitos (that one you can click). Anyway, they had a couple of drinks, someone bought me a club soda (I was surprised, as I thought it was water when I gulped it... water with gas).
All in all, Thursday was good, let's see what Friday holds :)
I'm looking for a beach companion for the weekend. You don't have to look in a bikini, but it would be an added bonus (... you probably shouldn't have clicked that link...).
So yesterday was pretty good. I went on campus and watched speeches, which are about as good as I can expect for a summer session. I had lunch with my Mom, we went to a decent little pizza/italian place (although her sandwich looked a heck of a lot better than my slice of pizza. I hadn't seen my Mom in a while. Even though she's cane free now she still walks with a bit of a limp.
Last night I went in the dance studio and had my two hours with Carol. She has complete faith in me and leaves everything in my hands. I keep trying to remind her that she's the boss, but... anyway, I'm really happy with her progress. I'm throwing some really difficult concepts at her, and I'm being just as critical with her as I've ever been, but some how its all fun. She's amazed when I can sense that her knee is bent (even though its clear to me that its bent from how she's standing on it) and I'm like some guru to her. It really makes me wonder just how much of a crappy dancer you can be and get away with teaching dance at a studio like this...
After the lesson Janet asked me to hang around so she wouldn't be the only one to answer the phones if they started ringing wildly (they never did). So I went in and helped out with Adrianne's class. She is probably one of, if not the, best dancers at the studio. She's got a background in general dance, and she teaches class just like its a tap/jazz/hip hop class. She starts the music and loudly yells out '5..6... 5678 with a country girl twang. I always forget about the differences between ballroom dancers and dancers... Her students seem to love her, so I guess that speaks the most about her. She's a somewhat attractive, petite little girl, and I don't think I've got her figured out yet. It seems like everything is just a little too interesting to her, like she really doesn't care but feigns interest like a good southern girl should... but like I said, her students lover.
Most of the class went out to this fancy bar on 6-forks... can't remember the name, its in peachtree plaza, and they invited us along. I'm not sure this was the case, but I got the impression Adrianne wanted me to go so she wouldn't be the only young person there. It was fun, apparently this is one of this later-middle aged groups who must have partied a lot in their youth. They go for a drink after every class, this place is the best spot for mojitos (that one you can click). Anyway, they had a couple of drinks, someone bought me a club soda (I was surprised, as I thought it was water when I gulped it... water with gas).
All in all, Thursday was good, let's see what Friday holds :)
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)
