I've done it again!

I have let something I can't have make me unhappy. The worst thing of this is that I walked right into it with my eyes wide open. I knew what I was getting myself into, but I did it anyway. It's like getting high... you know that you're eventually going to come down and crash hard, but you take the hit anyway. That's one of the reasons I've never done drugs. It's stupid to do something for temporary enjoyment when you know that in the end you'll be worse off than when you began.

I knew very early on that I wouldn't be able to get what I wanted, but I put my blinders on and reveled in the moment of something new. Now the moment has nearly passed, and I am beginning a fast and bumpy descent. A crash is eminent.